Study Shows Attraction To Tall Men Drops By 87% When Their Giant Goddamn Head Blocks View At Movie Theatre

Junkin, T. et al.

While numerous studies have shown a strong correlation between male height and attractiveness, new research from the Short Kings Institute reveals that a man’s boneability plummets when his huge noggin obstructs various forms of live entertainment.

When subjects were placed at a movie theatre in front of respondents, men tall enough to block respondent’s view of A Bug’s Life were rated as “so fucking annoying,” and “absolutely  unfuckable,” despite having near perfect attractiveness scores otherwise. 

“It was a real wake-up call,” said one heterosexual woman, who rated the same tall man as “Sexy Prince Charming” while watching him read at a table, but then as a “Stupid Fucking Beast,” when he was placed in front of her at a Carly Rae Jepsen concert.

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