Most cited

“I can swim into any ocean and not be questioned about whether or not I belong”

“I only read the pre-lab five minutes ago, I don’t know how this thing works at all. It’s the size of a rhino and apparently pretty fragile.”

A local sparrow was stunned after a DNA test revealed that 90% of his genetics are from something called a “Tonga Ground Skink” and not from a Tyrannosaurus rex, as his family has claimed for generations.

Women were carefully collected from Wine & Paint nights and Lifetime Channel movie auditions, then spun into fabrics using a converted SoulCycle gym.

“I was making pancakes and realized the side closest to the heat keeps getting all burnt up… why haven’t scientists used that idea to stop climate change yet?”