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October 22, 2020

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Biology

Scientist Falling For The Very Virus He Swore To Destroy
Chemistry

Theoretical Physicists Confirm Earth Is Neither Flat Nor Round, But A Series Of Quantized Earth Orbitals
Most cited

Grad Student Who Used Any Excuse To Avoid Lab Work Now Reminiscing About All The Experiments They Could Be Doing
Astronomy

Feminist Heroes! NASA Releases Stunning New Photos Of Mars Without Makeup
Research

Progress! This Ivy League Research Department Interviewed A Diverse Set of Candidates Before Hiring Some White Dude

Work-Life Balance Queen! This Researcher Does Calf Raises While Her Samples Centrifuge

October 20, 2020

Lazy Cell Still Gets Mom To Fold Its Proteins

October 18, 2020

Teen With Telescope Accused Of Peeping On Neighbouring Exoplanets

October 12, 2020

How To Make Your Grad Student Miserable: A Guide For Lab Animals

October 7, 2020

Jackpot! My Weird Uncle Found Six Great COVID Cures And They’re Only $99 On This Sketchy-Looking Website

October 6, 2020

Retro! This Hipster Chemist Only Pipettes By Mouth And Now He Is Very Sick

October 5, 2020

Latest News & Views

Bankrupt Company Forced To Sell Customer’s Data Just To Afford Executive Bonuses

August 27, 2020

Scientific Baby Names To Help Your Newborn Get Noticed By The Ivy League

August 24, 2020

Study Confirms Americans Will Believe Anything Said By People Wearing White Coats, As Long As They’re Not Doctors Or Scientists

August 12, 2020

Latest Research

How To Make Your Grad Student Miserable: A Guide For Lab Animals

October 7, 2020

Grad Student Becomes Lab’s Go-To Graphic Designer After Making Half-Decent Image In Powerpoint

September 28, 2020

Grad Student Desperate For Feedback Thrilled To Receive “K.” From Supervisor After Just 3 Months

September 27, 2020

More dnatured

Aww! This New Line of Bacteria Scented Candles Will Make Your Living Room Smell Just Like The Warm Room That Hasn’t Been Cleaned In Decades

August 10, 2020

Scientists Agree To Only Play God With Lifeforms That Were Likely To Worship Them Anyways

🔒 Open Letter From A Lab Rat: Please Remove The Tumour You Genetically Engineered Into My Anus And Explain Yourselves

How To Power Through A Pandemic Because Capitalism Demands It

Whoa! This New Fluorescent Antibody Is Just As Dim As The Previous One, But Twice As Expensive!

World’s Most Powerful Supercomputer Capable Of Calculating BOOBIES To Seven Digits

Scientists Now Say Diplodocus May Have Evolved Whiplike Tail To Spice Things Up In The Bedroom

Wow! This University Is So Committed To Improving Mental Health It’s Making Student Volunteers Help Each Other For Free

Wow! This Paleontologist Working From Home Just Discovered A New Dinosaur Species With Bare Foot

Queen Bee Executed After Successful Coup By Worker Bees

Wow! Several Videos Showed These Apples Were Bad But Then The Apple Union Was Like, “Nuh Uh,” And Now The Apples Are Tear Gassing Us

Fish File Complaint After Sharp Increase In Trash Dumped Into Their Waters

“We Condemn Racism In All Forms,” Says University Founded By Racists That Still Has Buildings Named After Notorious Racists

Epidemiologists Sound Alarm About Drastic Increase In “Disappearing Spine Disease” Currently Ravaging Elected Officials

Local Sharks Disappointed To Learn Beaches Weren’t Closed Because Of Them

Terrified Scientists Discover Colossal Squid’s Even Bigger Ancestor: Absolute Unit Squid

Aww! FOX Just Donated Millions Of “The Masked Singer” Costumes To Some Confused Hospital Staff

Uh Oh! Scientists Warn Of Fierce New Drag Queen Bees Here To Slay The Competition (And You)

Scientists Fear That Society Is Unprepared For Imminent Post-Covid-19 Orgy

HGTV Announces Even Tinier House Hunters Spin-Off Featuring All-Hermit Crab Cast

Quantum Physicist Creates Super Colander To Strain Away Excess Particles

Exasperated Health Officials Move to Rebrand Every Fruit and Vegetable as Superfoods

Genius? This Lab Is Funded Entirely By Cashing In Life Insurance Policies On Lab Rats

God Not Sure How to Tell Humanity That E. Coli Is The Species Made in His Own Image

Student Lifehack! 5 Easy Recipes You Can Make With That Black Crust In Your Microwave

Zoologist Takes Credit For Pandas Mating After Playing Them His “Songs To Smash To” Playlist

Researchers Discover Busted Ass Bird So Ugly And Annoying They Would Like To Un-Discover It

Gut Bacteria Declare State Of Emergency After Record-Breaking Mountain Dew Floods

Microdosing Apples? This New Craze Could Keep The Doctor Just A Little Bit Away

Developmental Psychologist Struggles To Hide Excitement After Toddler Discovered Living In Wolf Den

Co-Convention on Environmentally Wasteful Travel & Spreading Infectious Diseases Should Not Have Been Held On Cruise Ship, Say Stranded Attendees

Overworked Primary Alcohol Excited To Oxidize With Long, Hot Reflux

Kinky Alpha Helix Experiments With Peptide Bondage

Incredible! This Horse Sanctuary Runs Entirely On Big Dick Energy

World Leaders Pledge to Replace Earth Hour With Earth Moment of Silence by 2050

Friends Encourage Blue Moon To Seek Therapy

Most cited

Theoretical Physicist Travels Back In Time To Persuade Younger Self To Go Into The Trades

Protocol: How To Get A Cute, Mid-Tier Journal To Notice You

Protocol: How To Encrypt Your Lab Notebook Using The Power Of Shitty Handwriting

New Climate Change Solution? Man Suggests Flipping Earth To Cold Side

Latest Issue

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Parents Demand Recall After Child Who Read ‘Quantum Physics For Babies’ Still Can’t Explain String Theory

May 13, 2020
Wow! This Overachieving Academic Published AND Perished

February 4, 2020
God Not Sure How to Tell Humanity That E. Coli Is The Species Made in His Own Image

April 22, 2020
Scientists Say The Ocean Now Contains So Much Plastic That We Should Call It “The Plastic” And Be Happy With How Much Ocean It Contains

July 2, 2019
“We Condemn Racism In All Forms,” Says University Founded By Racists That Still Has Buildings Named After Notorious Racists

June 9, 2020
Grad Student Desperate For Feedback Thrilled To Receive “K.” From Supervisor After Just 3 Months

September 27, 2020
Cool! This Bottle Of Reagent Has Been In The Lab So Long It Just Received Tenure

May 9, 2020
“Pretty Sure I Don’t Belong Here” Says Impressive Line On Your CV

April 1, 2020
Incredible! These Military Engineers Created An Invisibility Cloak Made Of Women Over 40

February 14, 2019
Sparrow Bragging About T-Rex Ancestry Actually Descended From Some Bitch-Ass Lizard

February 16, 2019
Protocol: How To Get A Cute, Mid-Tier Journal To Notice You

February 2, 2020
How To Power Through Seasonal Depression Because Capitalism Demands It

January 19, 2020
How To Power Through A Pandemic Because Capitalism Demands It

July 24, 2020
Help! My Advisor Said They Were “Just Going Out For A Pack Of Smokes” And Now They’re On Sabbatical For A Year

January 20, 2020

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dnatured is a satirical scientific journal with impact factor 69. We strive to publish the most paper cutting scientific research, protocols and news.

Copyright 2019

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