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November 20, 2020

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Biology

Lab Rats Find That 1 In 3 Researchers Could Be A LITTLE More Gentle
Medicine

How To Power Through A Pandemic Because Capitalism Demands It
Biology

17-Year-Old Lab Student Somehow Trusted With Two-Million Dollar Machine
Biology

Sparrow Bragging About T-Rex Ancestry Actually Descended From Some Bitch-Ass Lizard
Biology

Mitochondria Confirm They’re Also The Power Bottom Of The Cell

Student No Longer Sure If They’re Snacking Between Study Sessions Or Studying Between Snacking Sessions

November 19, 2020

Whoopsie! Researcher Accidentally Submits Paper To Science Total Landscaping

November 17, 2020

Whoa! Historically Red Mars Flips Blue

November 7, 2020

Department’s Passive Aggressive Post-It Note About K-Cup Usage Somehow Better Written Than Its Anti-Racism Statement

November 6, 2020

Tired Of The Pandemic? Check Out These 8 Planets That Are 100% COVID-Free

November 2, 2020

Protocol: How To Pay Attention To A Virtual Lecture When The World Is On Fire

November 2, 2020

Latest News & Views

Whoops! This Research Chemist Forgot To Add “But Not For Drugs” At The End Of Their Google Search And Now They’re On A Watch List

September 15, 2020

Bankrupt Company Forced To Sell Customer’s Data Just To Afford Executive Bonuses

August 27, 2020

Scientific Baby Names To Help Your Newborn Get Noticed By The Ivy League

August 24, 2020

Latest Research

Whoopsie! Researcher Accidentally Submits Paper To Science Total Landscaping

November 17, 2020

Department’s Passive Aggressive Post-It Note About K-Cup Usage Somehow Better Written Than Its Anti-Racism Statement

November 6, 2020

Protocol: How To Pay Attention To A Virtual Lecture When The World Is On Fire

November 2, 2020

More dnatured

Study Confirms Americans Will Believe Anything Said By People Wearing White Coats, As Long As They’re Not Doctors Or Scientists

August 12, 2020

Aww! This New Line of Bacteria Scented Candles Will Make Your Living Room Smell Just Like The Warm Room That Hasn’t Been Cleaned In Decades

August 10, 2020

Scientists Agree To Only Play God With Lifeforms That Were Likely To Worship Them Anyways

🔒 Open Letter From A Lab Rat: Please Remove The Tumour You Genetically Engineered Into My Anus And Explain Yourselves

How To Power Through A Pandemic Because Capitalism Demands It

Whoa! This New Fluorescent Antibody Is Just As Dim As The Previous One, But Twice As Expensive!

World’s Most Powerful Supercomputer Capable Of Calculating BOOBIES To Seven Digits

Scientists Now Say Diplodocus May Have Evolved Whiplike Tail To Spice Things Up In The Bedroom

Wow! This University Is So Committed To Improving Mental Health It’s Making Student Volunteers Help Each Other For Free

Wow! This Paleontologist Working From Home Just Discovered A New Dinosaur Species With Bare Foot

Queen Bee Executed After Successful Coup By Worker Bees

Wow! Several Videos Showed These Apples Were Bad But Then The Apple Union Was Like, “Nuh Uh,” And Now The Apples Are Tear Gassing Us

Fish File Complaint After Sharp Increase In Trash Dumped Into Their Waters

“We Condemn Racism In All Forms,” Says University Founded By Racists That Still Has Buildings Named After Notorious Racists

Epidemiologists Sound Alarm About Drastic Increase In “Disappearing Spine Disease” Currently Ravaging Elected Officials

Local Sharks Disappointed To Learn Beaches Weren’t Closed Because Of Them

Terrified Scientists Discover Colossal Squid’s Even Bigger Ancestor: Absolute Unit Squid

Aww! FOX Just Donated Millions Of “The Masked Singer” Costumes To Some Confused Hospital Staff

Uh Oh! Scientists Warn Of Fierce New Drag Queen Bees Here To Slay The Competition (And You)

Scientists Fear That Society Is Unprepared For Imminent Post-Covid-19 Orgy

HGTV Announces Even Tinier House Hunters Spin-Off Featuring All-Hermit Crab Cast

Quantum Physicist Creates Super Colander To Strain Away Excess Particles

Exasperated Health Officials Move to Rebrand Every Fruit and Vegetable as Superfoods

Genius? This Lab Is Funded Entirely By Cashing In Life Insurance Policies On Lab Rats

God Not Sure How to Tell Humanity That E. Coli Is The Species Made in His Own Image

Student Lifehack! 5 Easy Recipes You Can Make With That Black Crust In Your Microwave

Zoologist Takes Credit For Pandas Mating After Playing Them His “Songs To Smash To” Playlist

Researchers Discover Busted Ass Bird So Ugly And Annoying They Would Like To Un-Discover It

Gut Bacteria Declare State Of Emergency After Record-Breaking Mountain Dew Floods

Microdosing Apples? This New Craze Could Keep The Doctor Just A Little Bit Away

Developmental Psychologist Struggles To Hide Excitement After Toddler Discovered Living In Wolf Den

Co-Convention on Environmentally Wasteful Travel & Spreading Infectious Diseases Should Not Have Been Held On Cruise Ship, Say Stranded Attendees

Overworked Primary Alcohol Excited To Oxidize With Long, Hot Reflux

Kinky Alpha Helix Experiments With Peptide Bondage

Incredible! This Horse Sanctuary Runs Entirely On Big Dick Energy

World Leaders Pledge to Replace Earth Hour With Earth Moment of Silence by 2050

Most cited

Cool! This Bottle Of Reagent Has Been In The Lab So Long It Just Received Tenure

Wow! This Overachieving Academic Published AND Perished

Theoretical Physicist Travels Back In Time To Persuade Younger Self To Go Into The Trades

“We Condemn Racism In All Forms,” Says University Founded By Racists That Still Has Buildings Named After Notorious Racists

Latest Issue

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Grad Student Desperate For Feedback Thrilled To Receive “K.” From Supervisor After Just 3 Months

September 27, 2020
Scientist Falling For The Very Virus He Swore To Destroy

April 29, 2019
Grad Student Becomes Lab’s Go-To Graphic Designer After Making Half-Decent Image In Powerpoint

September 28, 2020
Report: Grad school make u feel real dumb and sad :(

September 9, 2019
Amid Pandemic, City Rats Petition Government For Some Stimulus Garbage

May 25, 2020
Feminist Heroes! NASA Releases Stunning New Photos Of Mars Without Makeup

April 7, 2019
Scientists Say The Ocean Now Contains So Much Plastic That We Should Call It “The Plastic” And Be Happy With How Much Ocean It Contains

July 2, 2019
“We Condemn Racism In All Forms,” Says University Founded By Racists That Still Has Buildings Named After Notorious Racists

June 9, 2020
Wow! This Overachieving Academic Published AND Perished

February 4, 2020
Great White Shark Finally Acknowledges Its Great White Privilege

May 23, 2019
QUIZ: Should We Try To Solve The Climate Crisis Or Just Let A Few People Make As Much Money As Possible In The Little Time We Have Left?

November 10, 2019
How To Power Through A Pandemic Because Capitalism Demands It

July 24, 2020
Yas Queen! Climate Scientists Say We Should Prepare For An Entire Hot Girl Century!!!

March 8, 2020
Protocol: How To Passive-Aggressively Let Undergrads Know There Is A CORRECT Way To Take Pipette Tips From The Box

June 12, 2020

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dnatured is a satirical scientific journal with impact factor 69. We strive to publish the most paper cutting scientific research, protocols and news.

Copyright 2019

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