Why Are There So Many Winter Car Accidents? This Scientist Suggests Drivers Must Be Suffering From “Some Sort Of Snow-Induced Amnesia”

Hallworth, M., Graham, L. et al.

After decades of research revealed that car accidents routinely increased during the winter, one scientist has a new theory: that the fresh snow may cause drivers to clinically forget how to drive.

“I believe it’s a type of retrograde amnesia, an inability to recall memories,” says Dr. Kyle O’Keefe from the University of Chicago. “It’s the same process that happens to people when you ask them why they didn’t get back to your email or go to your birthday party.”

Dr. O’Keefe continued to explain that even though the phenomenon happens every year, it always looks like something out of science fiction. “The sight of snow isolates and manipulates the electronic memory impulses in your brain, just like the Neuralyzer pen from Men In Black.”

Dr. O’Keefe furthered his theory of amnesia while interviewing drivers next to their smashed vehicles after this year’s first snowfall. “I just skidded out – it’s been a while since that’s happened!” said one driver. “Probably about twelve months!” 

Motorist David Shaw admitted “I remember putting on snow-tires, but I couldn’t for the life of me remember what they were for.” He continued “wow, it feels like it’s really gone to from summer to winter in the last few seasons.”

Scientists are also proposing that this is the same reason why people don’t dress properly on dates during the wintertime, but many are finding that the real reason is because “no one wants to pay for coat-check.”

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About Author

Marc Hallworth

Marc Hallworth has been part of NXNE, SiriusXM Radio's “Canada Laughs,” and was chosen as the host for part of the 2015 PanAm Games. His sketch troupe Vest of Friends was named Best-of-the-Fest at the 2016 Toronto SketchFest and the 2015 Montreal SketchFest, and one of Bite.ca's “10 Canadian Sketch Troupes You Need To See Right Now.”

About Marc Hallworth 14 Articles
Marc Hallworth has been part of NXNE, SiriusXM Radio's “Canada Laughs,” and was chosen as the host for part of the 2015 PanAm Games. His sketch troupe Vest of Friends was named Best-of-the-Fest at the 2016 Toronto SketchFest and the 2015 Montreal SketchFest, and one of Bite.ca's “10 Canadian Sketch Troupes You Need To See Right Now.”