Star Mortified After Astrarazzi Publish Unflattering Photos Of Its Sunspots

Ito, R., et al.

Pegasus-based star Omicron Pegasi is reportedly fuming following the publication of an unflattering photo in galaxy tabloid UStronomy Magazine. The photo, which gives an extremely close look at the sunspots on various stars’ photospheres, has made waves on the internet as the cover image for the January issue.

“It’s so unfair! They used a wide-angled telescope!” Pegasi tweeted. “These trashy scientific journals always go out of their way to make us supergiants look unstable when really I was just having a bad magnetic field day, as we all do!”

Will Anderson, editor of UStronomy Magazine said that they were going for realism in the shot, and did not mean to cause any distress but stands by the photo itself. 

“All we were trying to do was show that even the brightest of stars are just like us. We are trying to normalize a wide variety of celestial body types, including perceived ‘flaws’ like solar flares,” explained Anderson. “Everyone is complaining that star photos are all airbrushed, and that it’s affecting the self-esteem of young protostars.”

Other stellar masses in the galaxy have expressed support for Pegasi. In particular, neighbouring Zeta Pegasi expressed concern for the displeased star. “Honestly, the spot isn’t that bad. We tried telling Omicron that it will probably go away in a while. I just hope Omicron doesn’t do anything drastic like go full supernova. None of us want to get sucked into that black hole.”

At press time, Pegasi was busy blocking the release of some photos from it’s wild nebula days which are rumoured to be highly offensive. 

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