Queen Bee Executed After Successful Coup By Worker Bees

Ito, R. et al

Today, the reign of Elizabuzz XI has come to a bloody end after yielding to a rival claimant, former worker bee Beeatrice of the colony’s Sector C. As per custom, the former queen was killed on the spot, with her opponent declaring a transition to democracy for the Chesswood Bee Farm hives.

“Today marks a new day for the hive!” proclaimed Beeatrice, leader of the bee anti-royalist party, from the balcony of the royal honeycomb. “No more will royal jelly be reserved for those who curry favour with the throne. No longer will we throw our insect lives away on raids on picnicking humans! I will make this a hive where even the lowliest drone will have protection!”

Despite the legitimacy of Beeatrice’s ascension, many loyalists to Elizabuzz XI are choosing exile or ceremonial suicide over new oaths of fealty. “I’ve served the old queen for many weeks. I swear to Keeper, I won’t bow to a usurper!” said one of the hundreds of workers who were preparing to hand in their stingers and die this afternoon.

Royalist sympathizers may be the least of the new queens’ problems. 

“There have been sightings of marauding swarms of murder hornets in the north, decapitating entire hive,” said Drone #6791, the newly appointed Minister of Intelligence. “To make matters worse, Elizabuzz XI emptied the hive’s coffers, leaving the crown without enough honey to bribe the brigands away should they turn their eyes to us.”

In order to strengthen her claim to the throne, Beeatrice is expected to mate with all 25,000 of Elizabuzz’s sons. At press time, Beeatrice is also reportedly seeking to make alliances with several monarch butterflies. 

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About Author

Rob Ito

Rob Ito is a Canadian satirist, comedian and writer. He has previously written for the Beaverton and appears in shows all around Toronto regularly. You can follow Rob on Twitter at @theFakeRobIto.

About Rob Ito 19 Articles
Rob Ito is a Canadian satirist, comedian and writer. He has previously written for the Beaverton and appears in shows all around Toronto regularly. You can follow Rob on Twitter at @theFakeRobIto.