Cute Summer Outfits You’ll Never Get To Wear Because They Are Banned From The Lab

Graham, L. et al

Want to wear something that isn’t banned from the lab? Check out the DNAtured Store for masks, t-shirts, notebooks, and more!

Distressed Boyfriend Jeans

These jeans are as distressed as your lab manager is going to be when they see you, imagine the paperwork after those holes let droplets of distilled water onto your unprotected knees.

T-Shirt Dresses

You had us with t-shirt, which can be covered by your lab coat, but lost us at dress.

Sky-High Boots

Save these stilettos for a conference! One errant kimwipe on the floor could send you careening into the fume hood.

Pleated Skirts

While we applaud the double layer of fabric in the top part of the leg, it seems to come at the expense of the now completely unprotected lower legs. Try pleated pants as am alternative!

Long-Sleeved Print Dresses

If only you had cut off the sleeves and made them into pants 🙁 sorry but these are still a no no!

Rounded Metal Sunglasses

We are all for eye protection, but sunglasses do not come with splash guards for the 95% ethanol you work with, so they are banned.

Chunky Peekaboo Sandals

You’ll thank us when you don’t have a zebra stripe burn pattern when your lab mate errantly pipettes some acetic acid through the slits.

Bohemian Sandals

Oh so you want acetone taking off that layer of nail polish?

Vibrant Crocs

From the runway to the hallway, crocs are a bona fide hit with all ages, but those comfy lil holes can let 0.1 mol/L HCl (it has a pH of 1!!!!) in.

Cut-Off Jeans

Just the easiest way to get acid-wash legs.

Floral Jumpers

Unless those flowers can hop off and cover your precious shins, this is also a no.

Short Shorts

Not sure why we have to go over this again, NO SHORTS!!!

Jean Shorts

NO! SHORTS! There are safer ways to singe off your upper leg hair!

Shorts In General

We GET IT. Your gams are beautiful and majestic and you want to show them AWF, but you must save it for the 0.5 hours that you aren’t in the lab!

Want to wear something that isn’t banned from the lab? Check out the DNAtured Store for masks, t-shirts, notebooks, and more!

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About Author

Lexa Graham

Lexa Graham is a comedian with a Master’s degree in Chemical Engineering, and the founder and editor of DNAtured Journal. She has previously written for Reductress, CBC Comedy and also had her research published in The Canadian Journal of Chemical Engineering. You can follow her on Twitter @LexaGrammar.

About Lexa Graham 96 Articles
Lexa Graham is a comedian with a Master’s degree in Chemical Engineering, and the founder and editor of DNAtured Journal. She has previously written for Reductress, CBC Comedy and also had her research published in The Canadian Journal of Chemical Engineering. You can follow her on Twitter @LexaGrammar.