Environment Scientists Say The Ocean Now Contains So Much Plastic That We Should Call It “The Plastic” And Be Happy With How Much Ocean It Contains July 2, 2019 Amar Singh Since it’s mostly plastic at this point, maybe we just give up on calling it The Ocean
Biology 17-Year-Old Lab Student Somehow Trusted With Two-Million Dollar Machine May 5, 2019 Marc Hallworth “I only read the pre-lab five minutes ago, I don’t know how this thing works at all. It’s the size of a rhino and apparently pretty fragile.”
Environment Illegal Logging Company Says It Was Just Checking Out The Age Of All Those Trees March 18, 2019 Editor
Astronomy Physicists Discover Dark Matter Has Harder Time Finding Employment March 16, 2019 Leonard Chan One employer, who preferred to remain anonymous, asked, “how can I hire matter I can’t even detect?”
Biology Marine Biologists Confirm Mermaid That Washed Up On Shore Had Stomach Full Of Thing-A-Ma-Bobs March 7, 2019 James Island
Biology Sparrow Bragging About T-Rex Ancestry Actually Descended From Some Bitch-Ass Lizard February 16, 2019 Lexa Graham A local sparrow was stunned after a DNA test revealed that 90% of his genetics are from something called a “Tonga Ground Skink” and not from a Tyrannosaurus rex, as his family has claimed for generations.
Engineering Incredible! These Military Engineers Created An Invisibility Cloak Made Of Women Over 40 February 14, 2019 Lexa Graham Women were carefully collected from Wine & Paint nights and Lifetime Channel movie auditions, then spun into fabrics using a converted SoulCycle gym.
Biology Protocol: How To Convince Your Date To Come Back To Your Lab Because You Have A Timepoint To Finish June 5, 2023 Lexa Graham
Most cited Protocol: How To Encrypt Your Lab Notebook Using The Power Of Shitty Handwriting June 5, 2023 Editor
Environment Climate Scientists Say Rising Sea Levels Are Either Caused By Climate Change Or A Bunch Of People Getting Into The Water At The Same Time June 5, 2023 James Island
Biology Grad Student Becomes Lab’s Go-To Graphic Designer After Making Half-Decent Image In Powerpoint June 5, 2023 Valerie Bentivegna
Astronomy Astronomers Admit Pretty Much All Constellations Look Like Penises To Them February 27, 2023 Editor
Biology School Marching Band Tries To Boost Crowd’s Energy With Musical Rendition of The Citric Acid Cycle January 23, 2023 JW Casey
Chemistry Unlabeled Bottle in Chemistry Lab “Definitely Acid of Some Kind” According to Undergrad Whose Hands Are Burning November 23, 2022 Jimmy Carl
Astronomy Hottie Alert! The James Webb Telescope Just Found A New Heavenly Body That Is Absolutely Jacked November 7, 2022 Jimmy Carl
